RIP 2005-2006 Hockey Season
Dear Mr. Scarano (Athletic Director of the University of New Hampshire),
Marty . . . as the 2005-2006 UNH wild cat hockey season has come to a sad end I feel that it is time to look forward to the future of the program and figure out how to bring the team to the next step of bringing home that ever elusive NCAA championship.
The work you have done over the past season has been amazing. The football and woman's hockey teams finished first in the country and although the men's hockey team had an off year it wasn't like we were Merrimac or Northeastern. I feel the problems with the men's hockey team will take care of themselves (Yandel is graduating). However this alone won't bring the men's hockey team or the other teams to the next level. The sense of community that you have brought to the UNH athletic family has been very strong. You got rid of the hatred and theoretical racism of that damn song Black Betty. This was a good start however I feel that more work needs to be done in this area. I think the next group we need to focus on is the poor animals of this world. As the NAACP found Black Betty to be racist the members of PETA feel that the use of animals as mascots is theoretically speciest.
I feel the time is now to put an end to the spieciest actions of the great University of New Hampshire. Know I know what you are thinking . . . Maine will still be the black bears, BU will still be the Terriers, and BC will still be the Eagles . . . . so if they can do it why can't we. WHY???? Because we are UNH and we are better. We didn't start playing Black Betty just because they were playing it. As the University of New Hampshire we should be leading the way and setting the example for these other institutions of higher learning.
The time is now to reveal the new mascot for the University of New Hampshire. The 2006 - 2007 team shall be known as the UNIVERSITY OF NEW HAMPSHIRE HOSERS!!! Just look at this bunch the couldn't be considered offensive to anyone.
As you can see we have already found a sponsor for the new mascot . . . which we know will make you happy since it provides yet another money making plan for the highly corporate University of New Hampshire. Also thinking of the endless marketing possibilities we the new mascot's . . . in addition to the hockey jerseys in home, away and third jersey varieties you could sell official UNH hoser glasses in UNH blue for the fans in attendance at the sporting events (see the children's version pictured below).
The sad part of the new hoser motif is that I don't think you are the best man to promote the new UNH image. Don't worry . . . you will not be fired . . . instead you will be promoted to the new position of head janitor at the Whittemore Center. While you are changing the urinal cakes in the bathrooms Black Betty will be played nonstop for your listening enjoyment. We know that you actually love this song but because of political correctness it can not be played in the Whitt when the public is present.
The new Athletic Director and assistant Athletic Director of UNH shall be Darci Wilder and Matt Pedone (see pictures above in hoser add 3rd person top row and 1st person bottom row). These changes will make UNH a perennial power house in all sports.
sincerely,
Nicholas Raimondi (aka the ass who was yelling at you in Albany on Saturday)
Marty . . . as the 2005-2006 UNH wild cat hockey season has come to a sad end I feel that it is time to look forward to the future of the program and figure out how to bring the team to the next step of bringing home that ever elusive NCAA championship.
The work you have done over the past season has been amazing. The football and woman's hockey teams finished first in the country and although the men's hockey team had an off year it wasn't like we were Merrimac or Northeastern. I feel the problems with the men's hockey team will take care of themselves (Yandel is graduating). However this alone won't bring the men's hockey team or the other teams to the next level. The sense of community that you have brought to the UNH athletic family has been very strong. You got rid of the hatred and theoretical racism of that damn song Black Betty. This was a good start however I feel that more work needs to be done in this area. I think the next group we need to focus on is the poor animals of this world. As the NAACP found Black Betty to be racist the members of PETA feel that the use of animals as mascots is theoretically speciest.
I feel the time is now to put an end to the spieciest actions of the great University of New Hampshire. Know I know what you are thinking . . . Maine will still be the black bears, BU will still be the Terriers, and BC will still be the Eagles . . . . so if they can do it why can't we. WHY???? Because we are UNH and we are better. We didn't start playing Black Betty just because they were playing it. As the University of New Hampshire we should be leading the way and setting the example for these other institutions of higher learning.
The time is now to reveal the new mascot for the University of New Hampshire. The 2006 - 2007 team shall be known as the UNIVERSITY OF NEW HAMPSHIRE HOSERS!!! Just look at this bunch the couldn't be considered offensive to anyone.
As you can see we have already found a sponsor for the new mascot . . . which we know will make you happy since it provides yet another money making plan for the highly corporate University of New Hampshire. Also thinking of the endless marketing possibilities we the new mascot's . . . in addition to the hockey jerseys in home, away and third jersey varieties you could sell official UNH hoser glasses in UNH blue for the fans in attendance at the sporting events (see the children's version pictured below).
The sad part of the new hoser motif is that I don't think you are the best man to promote the new UNH image. Don't worry . . . you will not be fired . . . instead you will be promoted to the new position of head janitor at the Whittemore Center. While you are changing the urinal cakes in the bathrooms Black Betty will be played nonstop for your listening enjoyment. We know that you actually love this song but because of political correctness it can not be played in the Whitt when the public is present.
The new Athletic Director and assistant Athletic Director of UNH shall be Darci Wilder and Matt Pedone (see pictures above in hoser add 3rd person top row and 1st person bottom row). These changes will make UNH a perennial power house in all sports.
sincerely,
Nicholas Raimondi (aka the ass who was yelling at you in Albany on Saturday)
posted by wildfan at 5:42 PM
1 Comments:
If we change our mascot to the University of New Hampshire Hosers we could be sponsored by Molson. After all, you know we need to get every bit of ad revenue we can.
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